if i kiss you.

happy teacher`s day to all the teachers out there :]

okays this is weird. normally i have alot of things to say. anyway i haven t been online for 2 days le. i bought alot of things :D i shoudln t be spending money. i should be studying! anyway for the 2 days that i didn t go online. i been embarrousing myself . wah lau. i never felt my face went so red before lor -.-

went to taka on thursday with deborah. before that had a small conflict with my mom. it was because of art . aiyah. i dunno la. but it is all okays now. anyway me and deborah went to the bag section then i saw this green retro bag. then i was like happy happy swing here swing there. then when i was about to walk off when i realise my bag like got this weird feeling. WAH LAU. is i already put back my real bag and bring the green bag with me. SO @#$@!%%#^. then deborah couldn t stop laughin and all. ARGH#$% #$%#@!. i mean like how silly can i get lorh -.-

then later went to starbucks cause deborah was thirsty . so me and deborah were hanging around the counter when one of the staff talk to us. she was like quite friendly la. so she was talking to me in this angmor slang. then i was the closest to her . so she ask me " where did you come from? " then i say so loudly. " oh singapore! " then both deborah and the staff gave a huh. then deborah said " oh we came from HOME. " sheet. then the staff was like smiling to herself.

i mean like . ARGH. nevermind.

went to tampines yesterday with wen and yi and deb.
as usual embarrous myself again.
):

but i bought new clothes!

OHHH CHERRY TREE.

sigh. i just had my english prelim. i thought i have written on a beautiful story on PERSEVERANCE. however, no no. EVERYBODY WROTE THAT TITLE ):

hey.
this is not good.

MANY MANY OTHER FISHEs

argh. my english prelim is tomorrow. i mean like woah, i think time is doing more than flying. sheet leg cramps. anyway i really want to get a B for english -.- to me, it is hard la. but you know the nike mission, NOTHING IS IMPOSSSSSIBLE. but guess what? i am not nike :] i am jingyun. so what is my mission? eat, sleep and play :] -thumbs up-

my mission rocks.

so hmm. how`s life . fine lorh.

anyway i have a tempting bubble on my palm. i got burnt and didn t wash it under water straight away. i guess it was because i was in front of everyone and them. so i put up a brave front and pretend nothing was wrong. wah lau. the pain is just like nothing i never felt before. very hot, itchy and burning. argh. i dunno how to describe it. so now i have a little pop on my left hand reminding me of that STUPID UGLY INCIDENT. sigh. why.

i really want to play floorball.
i really want to play floorball with my old team mates again.
i really want to forget about all that had happen to me.

-

there are certain friends i need to apolegise to and there are certain friends i need to thank! and most of all are hugging and loving the certain friends who mostly get me to the uppp-iest of my life :]

moooarks :D

whatever. i don t give a damn.

i think the creator of humans forgotten something.

The creator forgot to took away the feelings on how human judge you by first impression.

once you got a first impression, you will never change it. like for example, you see a beautiful girl, and all would coo she would be a nice girl, kind , generous, just by her pretty face. you know how fucking irritating is that?

the second thing creator forgotten is to remind humans that they make mistakes.

when you made a mistake in front of everyone, they will start judging you. HAHA, SHE IS SO CLUMSY. HUH, DON T LA. SHE WILL RUIN IT. HEY THIS GIRL, DON T TALK TO HER.
i mean like wtf is wrong with people nowdays? had they never came across the word FORGIVEN? had they never across the word SECOND CHANCE? okays. this is getting on my nerves.


no, i am not saying that THE CREATOR is the blame to the problems of humans. i am just disgusted at my ownself. why is it i have to care about what people think about me. why is it i want to be somebody? why is it i can t be myself? is it because nobody like `myself` ? i can t believe i just let her tell me like that. what actually provoke me when she said, ` jingyun you know what i don t like you, is you react very fast when people say bad things to you`. wth. then how would you react? i mean hello. your first reaction is like wtf. you would be thinking, what the hell would they say bad things about. then when i ask her would you react fast. she could only reply ` i dunno` obviously i was quite pissed la. okays wait. i admit it is my fault. it is my fault that things turn out this way. but why is it people only focus on your weakness? i mean hercules had his achilles heel. i dunno i dunno i dunno i dunno. i am so sick of this. so annoyed.

i thought i could shake off the past memories.
but a scar would always be a scar.

and i have reflected.
actually i am not talented at all.


what was i thinking?

PRELIMS.

mug mug mug.
study study study.
revise revise revise.
learn learn learn.
memorise memorise memorise.
think think think.
vomit
vomit
vomit.

SHEEEPs

if you see more than one sheep in the field, is it called SHEEPS? if you say yes, like sandy would, then YOUR WRONG :D no such word. its okays, don t kill yourself because you got the wrong answer. okays, anyway i like my new skin :] i think is like everytime i get a new skin, it always have something to do with rabbits. why ? WHY?

i dunno. and don t give a damn.

went to do printing in the morning. now waiting for mummy to come home with my mooncake :D am i still to old to light the lantern and walk around my block? or should i just stay fat and eat all the mooncakes i want? or stay emo and look at the moon xD.

no way. i am anti-emo.

anyway i am so so so bored.

JY rocks :D

=o WHAT THIS?
A NEW POST? CLAP :]

okays. i think after sandy see this post, she going to say i am bhb. YAY. so happy for soupers. we got our own radio :] no more kisser-ups, no more HEAD OF DJ, just us. the mushroom.

celebrated my aunty`s bday on saturday. i can t believe i made this cute little boy cried! it was just because he didn t like that i was scoring goals >;l well, later his uncle comforted him by giving me a yellow card which is actually a tissue paper. -.- then i just pretend to cry. gosh.you should see the way he stare at me with that killer look. i mean for a 5 year kid, he would stand there and cry, but he stand there and give me those eyes. i was like so shocked la. then later he took my hand and pretend it was a leash and he ran around me , like hoping i would get tangled and rolled down the slope. later, he tried his jackie chan kick, which he missed and his football tackle slide which again, missed :l . then after the game, he wouldn t talk to me and in his mind is FOREVER NEVER.

OH OH before that. there was this nerd which is actually my distant distant distant cousin. luckily is distant :] he was wearing a von dutch shirt, tattered and torned jeans and a very branded hat. BUT HOR, a bucky smile, a gel side hair, and those thick glasses. argh. argh. ARGHHHHHHHHHHH. when i saw him coming in, i quickly pat huay wen`s leg. LOL. then both of our reaction is WTF. okays la. this is bad. but, i can t take it.

huaywen and huay yi came to my house after the party.
and WE MADE A WEDDING VIDEO.DAMN FUNNNNNY. it is only 2 minutes long but when our parents see, is like they think is 1 hour. sians. all dead meat. lao liao.

i haven t played floorball for a long time. sigh.

I AM LAZY. THANKS AND BYE

FOUL.

i will never forget 9th August 2006. it is an ugly memorable day. somehow, i wished i could be stronger and protect her. but no, i am a girl with a weak strength.


















any man who hits a woman is a coward. A FUCKING COWARD. i swore i will one day make sure you get a taste of your own medicine, you fucking retard.

THELAKEHOUSE

had a big blast yesterday. went to the new cathy cinema to watch the lakehouse. the movie was not bad la but there was some parts i didn t exactly understand. before that, had to go to school to celebrate national day eve. IT WAS SO SO SO BORING >;l sgs idol cannot sing for nuts. i think half the time we weren t paying attention and i think because of the rain, we were release an hour earlier :D then the school gave us this budget file :D with recycled paper. aiyeah, just take la :D . then i am so scared. i am going to get my chinese Os result on FRIDAY. like wtf! i hope i pass ! i hope i pass! i hope i pass!

then one big group of us like mostly from 4e2. jun, jieying,peipei,nadiah,yvonne and me :D go and watch movie :DD before that, we had LJS for lunch at hougang . the service was like slowpoke la >;l then the manager who was serving me and peipei went into the kitchen and started shouting at people. peipei and i gave the wth-is-going-on face.

even though the movie started at 1, it was already quite a long queue at the box office. maybe they were buying other tickets, i am just assuming they are buying the same as me :D later we go plaza singapuraaa and walk. it is so boring ): , maybe it is because i am with the boring people . HAHAHA. joke :] later me and yvonne shared the SUPER LARGE POPCORN cause we were confident of finishing it la. then it is not bad la. just that, it is sweet until you eat and you get sick of it . it is actually caramel popcorn. jun, jieying and peipei and nadiah share the small popcorn. so after the movie, we still left like HALF THE POPCORN INSIDE. then the funny thing is peipei and jun and jieying and nadiah cannot even finish the small popcorn lorh xD

later all of us decided to sit from dou-b gaut ( sheet speeling) sit until outram park and then back again to hougang \sengkang. then later jun and i sat down and opposite got this angmor like the shirt never button, look like a drunken freak. then he kept looking and laughing and smiling at JUN :D not me thanks. then me and jun were quite disgusted like eew la. so later we alighted at outram park so the angmor also, then while he go up the escalator, he still stare and smile at us. damn funny. then later we quickly went back in the train. later all of us sat down then suddenly got this young angmor sat in front of us , i think only jun and i understand and we started laughing la. then i say: this one leh? then she say: THIS ONE OKAYS LA,. STILL NOT BAD. wah lau. like that also can xD

went to compass mall and sit in the library for a while to wait for my mother and my aunty for finish their jewellary making lessons. then i saw this guy like useing the library `s electricity to charge his lappy? you mean it is allowed meh? don t care la. sheet. just wondering . after that i join my aunty and mom for late tea at delifrance. the WASABI SAUCE is like SHIOK :D i finished one container. but don t ordered the fish dippers cause inside is not cooked. then my mother got to send it back 2 times. in the end we just cancel the order :D

i was sooo tired. from 7am to 9pm yesterday.
anyway sandy spell dhouby gaut as dou-b god.

i bought something for someone . cant wait to give it to @#$$.
:D

okays. this is a long long post.

IMPACT.

does that one word sorry really can make everything alright ? i mean, even if i do say it to you, will it change everything and back to the way we are? i tried ways to approach you but you simply brushed me off and you said i did it to you. why, why can t you scold me and shout at me so i will know what`s going on , instead of leaving me in the dark. however, nothing matters cause you don t want to pursue the matter and besides, it takes two hands to clap. i think you would be reading this , and laughing and smiling to yourself. your glad, i am punished in this manner. i don t get it, why i am so affected but you can continue the life you had without me there. maybe i should learn this from you.

-

mock biology was a freak test. if i can pass, i am happy. everybody is stumped. thank gawd. i don t feel left out.
:D lalalas.

KLEENEX.

hey. i dunno what`s up with my stupid nose. can t seem to stop sneezing and sneezing. now talking to sandy. so late le, still so high. before that , talk to pauline , then we crap and crap. later she told me this joke which i keep laughing at . some horse joke la. i dunno why, i find cold jokes damn funny. maybe is because you can never guess that damn answer.

mummy cook the best tomyam noodles :D i think if she open a shop, surely very popular :]

YIXIN ):

sheet la. don t have that 9pm show on channel 8 ): after today, my life can continue to be sians ): this is the only chinese show i am so intrudged in okays ): see, how many sad face have i type? anyway, happy ending :D but for guo bin, like he is the unwanted one. cause siqi and guojun is happy lalaing, yixin and weixing happy lalaing . THEN HOR. i think xiao ling very pei with victor :D cause they always suan each other. then left guo bin all alone ): nevermind la :D i take !

didn t go school today . went for english tuition. then go hougang mall for dinner.

i can no longer look forward to 9 `o` clock. now the show is replaced by the guy who ate the orange and kiss the girl who ate the pomelo.

WHO DO YOU THINK YOU ARE?

i am satisfied. i made a lot of friends today :D some really qian bian one >;l but overall, they are funny :D floorball is getting weird now days. keith was quite angry with us today. he said we are no postition to shout for a line change. but if we don t shout, they will continue scoring goals, airhooking, faking. i don t mean it in a bad way. just that yeah, we are waiting >;l

anyway. i think he was refering to me too :D

heck.

i cant balance my partnership a/c. this is bonkers.

MOCK.

nah. not mocking people. it is the mock exams ): sigh, everytime i hear the word EXAMS. i get like damn sians. i can t wait for this year to be like over. is like everybody will tell you better study hard, next year get dream course. study hard for your future job. I AM JUST NOT CUT OUT FOR STUDIES . sickening books. anyway, i don t really want to bother about you. you lead your life, i lead mine. since you want to be like childish, i just leave it like that.

anyway thanks to my dearest friends who still visit my stagnant -.- or decomposed blog. (;
don t waste your time la xD .

whoever mary is, i don t give a damn about your boii.
and i don t fancy twits :D
like you= euuuu
i = ii
me = muii.

like wtf is wrong with these people -.-

MOVE ALONG.

when you gotta keep it strong, move along move along
when everything is wrong, we move along.
and even when your hope is gone, move along move along
just to make it through.
right back where it is wrong, WE MOVE ALONG.

chinese Olevel listening compre is up tomorrow :l
sigh, just let me pass, GOD DAMN IT >;l
so i can get over it and worry about others.. STUFF.
i am sick of worry for someone who does not need it at all.
some fucked up waste of energy.
your NOT the only one on this planet.
go on, i don t care anymore.

come to think of it, i haven t started of english work. argh, is this what year 2006 meant to be?

or am i just feeling desperately sorry for myself just because of that ?

HELLO, are you there?

i am quite upset at the moment. I just can t take it what is happening around me. Yeah, maybe i am spoilt and i can t take the cruel world out there (if that is what your thinking) I just don t understand the changes that is going between us. I mean what is ___ trying to do? What did ___ hear, or maybe what did i do to ___. or maybe , ___ is just sick of my annoying presence. whatever it is , it is pulling me down. i enjoy the time i had with you and i hope for the best.

i can tell, __
you don t want to know me anymore.

but it is nice knowing you.

love:
JY.

-.- this letter is not about BGR relationship, thankyou.

it okays, i don t mind taking all the punishments or the blames
if it takes everyone having fun.
i will do it for you guys :D

yesterday we were all playing chalk and water,
play until so hilarous.
okays, it is partly our fault for screaming at 12 in the morning
but we hardly get together, surely a scream or 2 is harmless?
but heck la, in the end my father kao pei,
think i am the main problem and gave me confinement by ordering me to sit on the sofa.
i think Rocky sense me being so moody, then he pei me for a while.

wah lau :D
Rocky zui hao :D

-

yay :D
korkor coming back again :]]

EEYORE`S DAY

today i got a late late late late late suprise party from lejoy, peipei and yvonne :D they tricked me into thinking we are training for floorball. BUT I HAVE TO WAIT FOR THEM TO COME FOR LIKE 2 HOURS. nevermind. i needed to get outta the house anyway. my mother is always spoiling my clothes. ALWAYS.

i waited for them at the playground. i just sat there, kept thinking of what happen back there. Then i just sit at the bench and watched the boys played soccer. there was this really ke ai guy that kept looking my way but i was too upset to be filrting with him. BHAHAHAHA. nah, just kidding. but i think he is too young for me la :D OKAYS LA. WHAT SHEET AM I LIKE TALKING.

anyway, my good friends gave me a eeyore toy :D SO ADORABLE. and a eeyore cup :D
I am gonna use it and put my milo inside :D i sound so lame hor. LOL. anyway, peipei you promise to upload all the pictures we have taken :D

tommorow is my game,
winning is our name :D

REFEREE KAYU.

do you see that big big big big big 2 words there? that`s what happened in floorball interschool B girls today. I think if i see both of these referee again on thursday, they sure gonna get whacked by me. bloody ars. Because of my `stupid stupid stupid` tactic, i wanted to scare Bedok Town, SO I WENT UP TO THE ONE WITH THE BALL AND GUESS WHAT? i BOO her! then i think i tripped or something, i fell on top of her, then i wanted to grab my balance, i think i hold on to her. THEN, THE REFEREE GIVE ME A MINUTE OUT CAUSE I WAS PUSHING.

wtf. this is my first time getting a minute out.
THANKS HOR.
FOR GIVING ME THIS OPPORTUNITY.

we lost to bedoktown (1-5)
we thrashed oops i mean won hillgrove (16-0 )

i am really worried about thursday
going to be a tough match ):
WISH ME LUCK OKAYS :D

i can t help it , there`s like so many things i hate about my chinese tuition teacher. I rather prefer the old one . this new teacher is driving me nuts. here is a list of examples:

1. when i am reading out loud, she is resting her head on the table
2. when i am reading out loud, she is looking at my art project.
3. when i am reading out loud, she is biting her nails and looking out of the window.
4. when i am reading out loud, she is using my penknife to cut her nails
5. when i am reading out loud, she keep touching my bed
6. when SHE is reading out loud, she tells me to focus.

Somehow it does not make sense? She keeps asking me if i want a break, if i need a break. I mean if she wants a break, she can say so? I mean before my chinese O`s , i used to have 3 hours of chinese WITHOUT A BREAK. And i have to admit, my chinese really sucks to the maximum. So this results in bad hanyu pinyin. So everytime i pronounce wrongly, she will make a CHEK sound with her mouth loudly . I mean what`s is her problem? She should know this is my problem and there she is , tweeting like a bird. CHEK CHEK CHEK.

Okays, so the last 15 minutes would be conversation between me and her. I didn t want to talk to her today. She made me mad, REAL MAD. So i just kept my head down, avoiding her eyes while she went bleh bleh bleh away. Then she did something really really annoying.

She stretched out her hand and rubbed my head.

My immediate reaction was : WTF, GET YOUR HANDS OFF ME.

Only of course in reality, i gave a weak smile and moved back away. I am not some damn bitch. I am a homosapian.

-

love playing with crunchie today. her melodious melody is turning me on :]

C.....- WHAT ? :l

hehs. i just bought my $140 guitar today at bras basar. the service there is so muchhhh better and so is the guitar. satisfied, i bought it and i am loving it :D . can t wait for audrey to teach me tomorrow. but the problem is i am always biting on my nails, forget it, i will use the picker. :]
neh neh neh :] i didn t get the textures i wanted today for my art project, i just bought a mechanical pencil and some glow in the dark pen. how childish :D

we later headed down to raffles city. there was this lego pirate fair , do you know how cool it was ): suddenly wen started giggling to herself. i was like, what`s now? she pointed at the `big` lego woman who had big boobs. pretty hyteriscal. i mean what was the people thinking when they were building this? hehs. perverts.

i saw this super super superrrrrr nice sleeveless shirt in Esprit. It has this lightish lemon yellow strips ): I coudln stop admiring myself when i wore it. okays, i know i am pretty thick to say this. but sadly, i didn t buy it ): IT WAS $29.90 !! SO RIDICULOUS OKAYS! and it was suppose to the GRAND SINGAPORE SALES. - fold arms and kick esprit`s board- this is dumb >;[
for a piece of yellow cloth! argh! digusting sheet.

-

just watch X men 3 yesterday. shawn ashmore (iceman) is so cute la :] i could just kiss him on the cheek ! hehs. i thought ben foster was cute but after i saw some images of him in long hair. i urm, gave up on him. I am sorry, long hairs are only for girls. :l i am sorry angelman, you fly so gracefully but your hair kinda freaked me out. (: Keep your hair short and spikey , like how i love it :] Because i watched the x men3 movie late, i missed the opening of the world cup. I REALLY WANNA SEE . ): i think after i joined floorball, i didn t seem to scold men who watched football because in the end floorball and football is still chasing after one ball. I am not a hypocrite la ;D



i thought about it. i want to call my guitar - CRUNCHI.

CAT-CRASHED ACCIDENT.

i almost caused a cat to get rolled down by a car today. i wanted to pet it but it was so afraid and my sudden walking moment caused it to ran across a road. i heard a screech of car tires and the cat , eunice, rich, the driver and i were in shocked. Because of the cat, everything seem to be on a stand-still. Eunice screamed when the cat almost got knocked down by the car. I dunno why i am laughing about this now . I guess it`s the way she actually have emotions for the cat.

Eunice and i have a very funny friendship. one moment, we are laughing at each other and the next moment we are angry and start bickering at each other. However, it is was always better the next day. Not a perfect friendship, but at least i know she is considered as a friend, always putting a smile on my face most of the times. Like today during art remedial, i was sweeping the dirty floor. I think for the Chinese, it is sort of a bad thing to have a broom sweeping at your leg [i think]. I started sweeping near her, and while she was busy cutting her fungi. I decided to annoy her by tickling her feet with the broom. So there she was, crossing her leg , doing her work. Suddenly she screamed and she wanted to move her leg away to get it far far far away from the broomstick but apparently her leg was just stuck there! Pretty funny. You should have seen her dumb leg struggling to escape. I think i laugh pretty heartily. I even scared Izdihar and cause Miss Yvonne and Miss Seow to look at me. Then i took another glance at Miss Yvonne , she was smiling at me . Was she also affected by my infectious laughter or just plainly laughing at this strange girl who laughing so loud, rude for another word.

now i will just move on.
you don t want to talk about it , you don t want to start it. that`s why we will never understand, in other words i am stressing you so much. Why? we don t have the same character.


that why. that`s the answer.
plus i insist too much. okays.

the solution to the problem.
no wait. YOUR solution. but we will go along with that.
you know why?




I DON T GIVE A DAMN NO MORE.

TIRED OF EVERYTHING ;l

I can get so angry at myself at times. And when i do that, i can get so tired, so tired i can sleep it off.

Sometimes i think making friends are like barriers in my life. I think i am the unlucky one. I make friends who leave me mad, sad, and ALMOST everything negative. Guess maybe today is just one of those days, where i get so moody and fark up at small little stuffs. But the problem is these things have been in my head for a super long time. No, i am not depress. I am one of those person who wants to make everything right, apparently i am not doing it correctly.

HMM, maybe in your point of view, i am a small-air person who get mad at you for EVERYTHING. but why, why cant you see the things you`re doing is hurting me. I mean is this really friends? Forget it, maybe this ship is not even real. Let it sink in the middle of a deep blue ocean or get sucked down by the bermuda triangle. You don t even care, and if that is the way, i have nothing to say and drown in your selfishness.

i finally understand the ugly truth of making fun of people because i have just painfully experience it.

and telling a white lie can be so hurtful too.

i didn t tell anyone how i feel about today. i was afraid that my stupid paranoidness might burden them. So, i will just keep smiling like nothing had ever happen even though deep down i am regreting, i have to just move on with my life.

-

i am getting sick of sgs floorball life. everybody is in thier own world. and Mr. Wee just told me something uncomfortable. I don t even know if i can accept it. But for my love for floorball, can i just ignore them even though it is hardly possible? I am so so so afraid i might like them even though i am STRAIGHT. i think if that is the case, i better stick closer to boys :l . i said IF.

it scares me even though i am just thinking about it.

INDEPENDANT :l

i wanted to blog yesterday but blogger was down for maintenance. PRETTY ANNOYING ;l. Today is really an arty farty day. I had to do art from 9am to 5 pm. By the time i came home i was so sick of everything, plus i have that, does not help but to ruin the whole day. i just want to sit here , facing the computer and do what i wanna to do. I dunno whether is it me that is just paranoid or like i feel a sense of unwelcome-ness when i am near her. I mean it okay. I can just do fine, i think. I feel there more behind her,but she seem to have changed. She no longer the one i knew. Whatever it is, i hope it is me.

SICKENING HOMEWORK ):

- light the lighter- GOODY GOODY.
this is sickening la. i have so much work to do and yet i am here blogging, enjoying myself in an air-conditioned room while indulging myself in my favourite music. Although i am feeling pretty guilty, i am still human :D i need a freaking break ):

tomorrow have to wake up early again for remedial ): and then later have to travel allllll the way down to pasir ris for tution. If one day i shall collapse, i love you all so much :D

-

She grabbed my hand lightly and slowly lift them up and pointed them towards the sky. '' They are so shiny." Gigi then traced the glittering stars into shapes and figures of animals. I smiled at her curiousity for astronomy. " So what did you wish for ? " i whispered into her ears. Gigi giggled and quickly `zipped` her mouth with her baby finger. I laughed along with her. All my happiness came from her. We lie back and smelled the lavenders as they bend towards the right by the gentle breeze. Gigi rested her head on my chest and soon she was snoozing with a slight snore.

LATE B`DAY PARTY xl

the big late b`day party celebration still feel a little empty with Kor,Korkorwee and Yi Lin not around. there seem to be less party bags than last year. the remainings of the birthday cake seem to still have a lot more than last year. Presents seem to be lesser than last year too x). hmm, whatever i am trying to say, i miss you all la :]

we had a big dinner! the adults had a small game of mahjong while the kids play.
then i opened my lovely present and cut the delicious fruitcake.

what really set me thinking was how compeitive ryan was. He look so eager to go to Victoria Secondary School. I was quite taken back. Maybe i didnt really state my reasons properly on why he should not go to victoria but he stabbed me back on how he answered , giving me the tone like he was looking down on me. i agree, i am not smart. i agree, i am not in a good school. I have no position or right to tell him where should he go or not. Was he belittling me?

sigh i dunno,
all the best for PSLE to my dear huaywen and ryan.

-

i combed her silky brunette hair lovingly as gigi glazed at the sky with countless stars. We were in a field of meadows where frogs were croaking at a nearby pond. Gigi waited excitedly for her falling star. What did she wanted to wish for? A piano? An china doll? i was interuppted by Gigi`s shriek. There! The star flew past smoothly as Gigi closed her eyes and clammed her hands together. I looked at her peaceful face and hugged her. She was such a beautiful treasure that heavens have given me. Although the night was cold, the warmth from our love kept us together.

FARTING :D

Deborah just went back home due to her fever. She was supposed to stay over night at my house to celebrate my party but apparently she don t feel so good. BUT NEH-MIND LA, i am seeing her tomorrow anyway. I was packing goodies bag just now :] SO CHEAPSKATE, use those market plastic bag and throw in MARS, CRACKERS, MARSHMELLOWS, CHEWY SWEETS. And then with my artistic talents, i decorate the bag :D don t you envy MUUU-A?
:)

FUCK LEH. today i have to wake up ultra early just for art :l It starts at 9, so it was already 8:55. I was like SHEET, don t be late. Later she call my mother again. KNS.Last Monday, She told my mother i was playing truant when i actually went for lunch at J8 with Rich, Yvonne, Sonika and Lejoy. BLOODY FUCK LEH ): Spoil all of our moods. Stupid. Then when we rush back to the art room, she practically told everyone we went J8. Wah lan~ GO AND DIE LA.

BUT HOR, today was different! She was like 1andhalf hour LATE! She tried not to push the attention to herself and scold us for not asking the office to open the door. HAHAH. TRY HARDER HOR :D

i left early for art to go for english tuition. then my mother, Deborah and I went to the skin clinic because there was something wrong with Deb`s nails. Her medication was so freak expensive -.-
then we had burger king for dinner. :] saw this late 20s angmor guy, not bad leh xD.

HMMMM JAS,JAC,VK. Have fun marching hor :D

SO HIGH LA :D

just went out with pauline, jasmine, jacqueline and Vk la ;D they are like a bunch of little kids that are so lost lorh ): vk, btw the building is called cinneleisure where we eat LJS and play arcade la ! Because there are 5 of us, when we take neoprints is like so damn FARKING CHEAP LA (: take like 4 times or 3? AIYAH DUNNO LA :]

HANNNA , i love all of your too la :] SOOOO SWEET LORH. I LOVE THE PRESENTS YOU GUYS GAVE TO ME (:

WO HEN GAN DONG LEH :]
REALLLY!

-take tissue and clean my eyes-

BITTERBIRTHDAY.

i think it is going to be worse than bitter. it is going to be so farked up and dull. i mean like hello? i am gonna be 16 :D! but i have math remedial on that day, i have to go lectures on that day, peipei and gloria is going germany on that day, everybody is going somewhere on that day! even me! sigh. some birthday. and now all my mum could help was a simple dinner. thanks. i don t mean to sound spoilt. but this is the chance where i can watch a NC16 movie! play some pool! i really want something like WILDER for my party. sigh. although it is the thought that counts, i can t help feeling fed up and idoitic. HAPPY ADVANCE FARKING BIRTHDAY JINGYUN.

i don t think making fun of people is nice. i really feel like bashing you guys up. It is like over already!

today is the first time i panted while taking neoprints. Yvonne was gonna be the death of me!

i don t want to blog. i need to go somewhere else to bury my burden.

SPORTS DAY :D

i never expected myself to get 3rd in 800m finals
i never expected myself to get 3rd in 200m finals.
i never expected to be the champion of interhouse basketball
and i never expected our class to be the champion :D

so freaking happy lorh :D

i saw a lot of my old friends today. yvonne and peipei and chen qiu can t stop making fun of me -.- this is what you call friends huh D;

today he smiled at me :D
feel so ticklish. HAHAHAHAHAs.
i smiled back tooo!

lalalas-

anyway i had this strange call about me being the selected few being trained to be a artist. i thought my mother would be really supportive but she said it is BOOGUSSSS and there is only one acting company which is MEDIACORP :l and when i ask her to come along, she nicely replied,

" i don t want to get kidnapped too."

HOW SUPPORTIVE.

i am soooo tired. Chinese O level is coming. Can i do it? aiyarh, if i pass. I AM HAPPY ENOUGH as i am a BANANA :D

today zhi jie said something irritating :l
and i had a weird dream that i was holding somebody's hand , no wait, hugging actually.

i hugged yvonne today.
i didn t want to see his face :D

my legs ache like crazy and i really want to play a guitar :D

i havent updated for soooooo long :] guess i have been really stressed up about my MYE or plain lazy :] I PREFER THE FIRST CHOICE :D It does not really push the blame to me , so lalalalas, i shall escape my punishment of not updating for soooooo long :D

MYE is finally over! I am sure all of them will have this nice like line underneath like this:
F9

FANTASTIC, Fkeep it up girl!, Fexcellent, Fgreat,Fwell done, Fgood job!

and all this nice things go on except with the big letter F in front of it.
simply FSPLENDID.

gosh, i think i am going to die ):

-

i've got my heats tomorrow.
i don t think i can run with my choked up system. I guess i shall do the best i can :l

-

went out to J8 today. I think it was alright . I mean at least we went out right?

-

may i know when is the marking day and polling day holiday ):

sheet lor. Mr Wong say our result damn bad CAN. I mean i tried so hard . You think people want to fail? I think my geography is doomed too. My map-reading damn lousy. YEAH sure the gradient is difference in height over distance . In the first place, what is the height ): DIE LORH. i just sui bian give a stupid number. The highest for SS is Justin? OMG, me leh? ME LEH? feeling so farked up. I HATE THIS.

i keep studying the wrong subjects. It did not help that my father make it worse. I skip dinner just to study geography . SO THIS IS MEANT TO BE A GOOD THING RIGHT? My mother was suppose to buy back dinner but in the end my father didn t allow her to buy because i didn t JOIN THEM IN THE FIRST PLACE . so sheet lor. In the end i had to eat the burger that mother bought for me for lunch. So to let my father think that i am suppose to be 'starving'. I took the unwanted raisin bread, cut it into a circle and wrap it with the fillet O fish wrapper and place it back into the fridge. OMG- HOW DISGUSTING EH. Too bad.

later i found out that my mother cried because she could not do anything to help me and he add on to my problems. Then i just shrugged lor. I mean what am i supposed to do?

i think i am going bonkers .

this is only MYE but i am getting all so stress up. I think SS paper and obviously my CHINESE paper is doomed for sure. GAWD. Seriously is it that hard to pass or is it just me?

yesterday i saw something i was not suppose to see. I felt super uncomfortable. I could not tell anyone about it . Even i, myself, at first did not believe it. Later , i keep telling myself , i can t tell this to anyone. Because you cannot never look the same way at that person again. I was already so stressed up, thinking about it almost made me went retarded. I think my mother actually sensed something wrong. It took her quite a while to get me to say it. And when i finally spit it out, She said she saw it too. But both of us can only pretend nothing is wrong and go on with life. Why didn t she felt mad? Betrayed?

don t ask me what did i see.
i dun want to think about it anymore.

I hate MYE.

today is arsehole's birthday.
who? my father. the one and only BEAST.

i mean how sheethead can he get? He scolded my mother infront of everybody, even his parents? But because he is a spoilt brat, nobody could even say anything. thank gawd i didn t join them for lunch. i had too much revision to do and mug on. gosh, freaking STRESSIE.

We ate dinner at AMKcoffeeshop. I was quite pissed with my father. i didn t even mentioned to him a single word. I started munching on my food, and started staring at this beng whom seem to be my age but smoking. MAN. i really want to try. Just one puff. I wanna know what so big deal about these cigarettes. I think the beng caught me staring at him, i quickly turned my head away. And when i glanced back at him, i realised he was smiling at me. And then i told myself:

wait, is that a good thing or bad?

i gave a teensy weensy smile and never look to my left again.

-

i headed down to COURTS. stupid zen thingy. the ear piece seem to be auto- mute. Clever piece of junk. I ask the staff [which specialise in MP3]

Me : Hi, i was wondering if you sell Creative Earpiece
Staff: Hmm, i dunno what you mean
Me : urm, the part where you connect the music from the mp3 to the zen
staff: ohhhh that .
Me: uhhhuh-
staff: wait let me check it out.

-waits-


staff hands me a weird box.

me: this is a headphone?
staff: yup!
me: i want a earpiece.
staff: go cashier , down there got.
me: wtffffffff. [[ of course i was thinking that to myself ]]
staff: you go straight down
me: i been here BEFORE.

gosh.
EARPIECE.
I WANT EARPIECE.

-

anyways i don t think i will do so well for english. I was practically shivering . i couldn write finish. i coudln t tie the damn knot. teacher irritated. and alllll i could do was gave her the HEHE look.

tomorrow is english exam.
wish me luck (:
i mean it .
really.
ALOT OF LUCK ):
but save some for my chinese paper ;D

i dunno whether should i feel like angry although i know it is pretty useless. i kept my phone on silent and i didn t know her mother keep calling me and her sister kinda scolded me, telling me i am deaf and i should go see a docter. Hello, how was i suppose to know. I know i used to cause a big trouble last time but now i stop, i did it out of foolishness. I tried my best to help her at all cost, and now you saying this to me. Isn t my efforts not known? argh FORGET IT.

i didn t run today. english remedial end late today.
i am not really in the mood too.

deb, forget this matter.
just let her rattle.
because you always got me,
and although i am always the one that lead,
don t worry, because i am there,
right there for you. (:

-

they said we are meant together
i even thought about it.
but how?
though i love you so much,
and really wanna see you,
can we really get together?

a nice poem
meant for NONE OF YOU GUYS OUT THERE, GIRLS ALSO. (:<

lalala,
only i know is for who.

seriously if it think it is you :l
i think you better think again.
yeah i was angry with you because
my means of communication was gone.
fine. if you think i eff up your life,
then i am sorry.

go ahead and tell everyone
i made your life miserable.

when actually i was refering to
S-T-R-E-S-S



-

i had my maths paper 1 (fake) today. i think i seriously need to buck up. I somehow can t get my A1 or 2 anymore. Because nerds are invading my stardom planet :( LALALAS. look out! they are burning and destroying my planet with their fcking wisedom. SCREAM. RUN. while i sit here and think of ways to kill >;]

i wanna have a run tomorrow .
come on miss fat belly.
it is time for you to get hungry
and lovely shaped (:

stop it . leave me alone.
stop doing this to me.
you are freaking me out
why don t you understand?

-

LALALALAs.
i cut my hair and eunice say i look like nemo ): What is that supposed to mean? Nevermind, in my heart, Nemo is cute and chubby (: like my FAT FACE ):

To do list:

• study.
• revise.
• train
• have more confident in myself D;

the first 2 points seem so impossible D; i am getting too distracted. HMMMM.

YAY, she can join me in running , and together we will win medals (:

WOOT.

leave me alone.
if you want me to be happy,
move on, don t get stuck
because of me.
don t because of me,
you are doing this to yourself.

--

eustance,
you tell me
that i am always doing solo, i am never passing the ball, i am trying to act real big. And you disgusting creep, you actually plan one day before floorball training to scold me. How arsehole can you get. Do you know you are reflecting yourself in the mirror except your just putting my face there. let me tell you once again, i don t lick people's boot. And this is not being stubborn, you just hate it when people don t want to listen to your 'ALWAYS RIGHT' orders. I seriously want to know what girls see in you.

i am just so frustrated.
just so dam frustrated.

why don t you guys understand. all i really want is to get to our targets for this year, but are we really doing it? proving you wrong is one thing, getting together as a team is another...

touch my heart, feel it beat.
can you hear it?
she whispering :
"you hurt me too much,
now its time for us to let go.
your love that have once stayed here,
has now moved on, lost."

believe it.

floorball sarks when there are so many bitches and bastards around
but i am not giving up, i can t believe the coach just end it with us without
letting us have a say for ourselves, and you call yourself a FAIR COACH.
why don t you understand?
we are not bootlicker people.
we don t kiss your shoes and make it shiny.
you think we don t want to come for training?
you think we didn t miss our training?
but what can we do when it is STRICTLY
C girls training
C boys training
B boys training?

you say the B birls never come for floorball?
can t you see yunxian, gloria, yvonnne, peipei and me?
and you say B girls not coming for FLOORBALL.
are you FISHING blind?

yeah i curse and swear.
but how can i not ?
you threaten us to find more girls when this is all we got?
what the point of adding other girls when it is just as
good as DON T PUT ANY AT ALL.

Be in my shoes, try and stay calm?
yeah you try it?
don t play floorball for a month
GO ON.

don t put us in the school team?
after playing for 3 years?
and during the first month of this year, we actually aimed to win
and now you come and say
OH NO HOPE.

i don t believe you did this.
no hope?
tell me that
FACE TO FACE.

Take a flower that has odd number of petals. Start plucking out any one of the petal and say I MISS HER and then pluck another petal and say I MISS HER NOT. Pluck until you have no more petals left.

And the answer is

YOU SOOOOOOOOOOOOO MISS ME (=

why haven i been blogging? i do not know. all i know that the days i didn t blog, meant so much to me. Is there such thing as emotional in a happy way? Guess what, i am 15 reaching on 16. On April 3rd, Wednesday, it was the first time i went out, out at night (= . Pathetic, YES. But i don t care. I don t care what people think about me anymore. I just want to live my life the way it is. Gloria, Lejoy, Peipei,Yvonne and ME. (according to alphabetical order) don t scold me )= , went to pasar malam. Actually we were supposed to go and watched the floorball, Mr Wee's club and our B boys but UNFORTUNATELY, we had no consent form and we had to be SHOOED OFF. this is really what you called hao xin mei hao bao lorh )= NEVERMIND, i enjoyed myself at the pasar malam.

" JINGYUN, I AM GOING TO KILL YOU " that what yvonne said when we sat on the viking ship. Apparently yvonne never sat on the viking ship before, so yeah. OMG, yvonne's mouth is a perfect 'O' so funny. Then the best part was everybody was screaming and i was plainly laughing my arse off. i dunno. I was super super high! And then we took the crazy surf and peipei almost fainted and i laughed again. SO HIGH RIGHT (((((=

THEN ON APR 02, HAPPY 23th BIRTHDAY KORKOR (=
-MUAHS- I <333333 youuuuuuuuu.

THEN ON APR o4 , SHE BACK SHE BACK SHE BACK!!

Then today the giant arowana 's cave flood again.
Then the slaves like my mother and I.
Clean the farking floor like crazy and all the
king could do was stand there, watch us and then
watched the farking tv while we scrub.

LOLLLL. this is the first time i watched campus superstar. then i realise huang zhiyang looked like ZHONG SHENG. DAMN GAO SIAO! everytime zhiyang laughed, i will laughed with him. CUTE LARHS. and i prefer geradine than terasa )= HMPH.

today is a sunday.
sunday sarks.
i hate sunday
and monday
and tuesday. (=

omg, so many people reading my blog now.
i better watch what i say xD

surprisely today during school i don t feel sleepy at all xD. Especially during Biology! Maybe it is because the Chapter- Heredity is some sort interesting? WOOT GO CHROMOSOMES.

SHEET PRIZE WINNING LARHS
From 2.30 to 4, only rehearse like ONE TIME!
and before i went up stage, i can ACTUALLY feel nervous.

THEN THIS Mrs. LOH want to make us walk one BIG round the hall, hahas, then some of us lazy, go and cut halfway. damn funny. But in the end, some escaped from Mrs LOH 'sharp' eyesight and some didn t. Then while waiting for my turn, i was laughing with Wen xia. Sheet, i got scolded by my CARING math teacher.

" errr, please don t talk while queuing"

YARH, i am queuing up to BUY SOMETHING HUH.

blabbehs.


then today i never felt so nervous before. I actually DJ !!
So funny, Pauline was like TALKKKKKKKK, TALKKKKKKKKKKKK,
i think ys almost gave up on me xD
Then in the end, i just TALKKKKKKKK TALKKKKKKKKKK.
Also, when i am nervous, i cannot stop laughing away :l Some weird illness right? So when i talk, i laughed after each sentence. then pauline said When i Laugh, i got STYLE.

WAHAHAs GOT SUCH THING MEH xD
Anyway this was my first time, so quite inexperienced and unprofessional. x)
nevermind, nothing venture nothing gain (:

BLAHS.

-sobs- my freedom is now on paused.
my father just came back from Bangkok yesterday. )=
but its okay!
he will be going overseas again on tuesday or urm wednesday
sheet. when again?

yesterday was plain slacking.
and drawing of art.
if i have to draw another peacock,
i think i will just die.

i didn t reached my target for 2.4km today but i am just happy i was the first girl to arrive xD. xin ting was quite shocked to find out that i didn t stop at her, besides i ran with her and i had to be the one pushing her. oh well. i mean this is my last year, give it all i got.

thank gawd my mother dont have to come to school today, luckily i am not the selected one. today had to stay back for at least an hour to do some english work with Eunice. She really damn horny. Then when if come to making up names, she really want it to be damn perfect, sweet and classic. I almost fainted at that point of time. Again i regretted working with Mark. I mean SURE! He did INVOLVE himself for the first part, and later he just came up with I DUNNO WHAT YOU ARE TALKING ABOUT. -.- i am really peas.

had lunch with yvonne today. we did alot of childish stuff recently. this afternoon i was playing with food even though the drink stall uncle was staring at us. yvonne took a video of it. cannot stop laughing like a mad goondu.

yarh, some people out there would say : she already one.

thanks arh.

---

went to suntec later in the evening to meet wen and yi. while their parents went to the NATAS fair, we sat in the bookshop and read comics. i cannot stop laughing to myself. I realise comics have a lot of cold lame jokes that are really funny. came back home at 11.

i feel so shitty inside.
sigh.

woooh.

tomorrow is 2.4km run ):
man, i miss you girl. you were the one that motivated me to run, so that i can beat my record by 2 minutes. but where are you now girl? where are youuuu. i really want to see you. you were really one of the kind.

anyways, i am going to beat it again. i am aiming for 13 minutes now.

---

i think mrs loh is getting old. her voice is getting out of tune. today she was reminding us to do our holiday homework. I think Eunice and I were the only one who heard it as the rest did not laugh or anything.

" do you guys remember i gave yourrrr holiday homewark. If i amm nat wrong, i gave yourrrr at least fuck - pause- FIVE questions to do. "

it was so damn freaking obvious. but no one noticed it!!! omg. -smack forehead-
then Eunice was complaining how bias mrs loh was because mrs loh always scold eunice for talking to me. I think Loh have something against her because when i am talking to Eunice, she does not say anything about me. :l maybe it is because she don t really care. I think i have just failed my recent math test. Loh was super fed up with us today. She complained how slow we were, wayyyyy behind time and stuff.

She started on a new topic- STRETCH. So she introduced the topic by amusing us with a shiny new rubber band that stretched so magnificantly. I was amazed! She even taught us how to spell it! S-T-R-E-T-C-H. Did i get it correct Mrs Loh?

lamo -.-

today mr wong came up with a really childish game- scissors paper stone. but it was damn funny larhs. then i keep looking at him. then i came up with a table in my head and slowly count the number of times he put that xD. so when my name was called, i won xD hahas.

Had lunch with yvonne later.
i am trying to make her a kid again (:

HOW CAN I FORGET TO POST THIS!
MY FATHER WENT OVERSEAS
AND HE IS ONLY COMING BACK THIS
SATURDAY!

WOOOHHH.
THANK YOU GOD.
PLEASE ARRANGE MORE OF THIS OUTINGS FOR HIM

this is the first time i slept for 15 minutes during accounts lesson without getting caught. and when i work up, i ask eunice whether did she realise it and eunice replied :

"noo, she too busy talking to herself. " xD

there's no floorball today, which make the day super sian. lateer went to biology remedial. OH MAN, i wish i didn t go! she was not teaching, she was preaching. ):

--

today i had a super long talk with miss rokia. omg. i have to totally change my whole peacock project. this is really one sheet cock work. okays, what i was so angry about yesterday was that my mother came to school and talk to miss rokia because she didn t understand a word why i got a 0 for my CA1. LOLLLLL then on my progress card. it wrote TARGET: A2 SCORE: 0. i found that really unbelievable and funny. anyways, my mother said she want to learn from miss rokia.

o_O i told my mom to join after i graduate.

now my "feather" project will have to change to fashion designing.
naked women HERE I COME.
then Mr Nicholas is gonna coach me. Do you guys remember him? He is the one who gave me 7/10 for my charcoal drawing when i really don t like the picture.



oh yarh, mr oei.
i dunno what your talking about. i am not in your math class?

i just had a super big fight with my mother.

okays fine. it is partly my fault but she should have come and consult me first
no wait, who am i to her that should she listen to me.

however i told her many times i will settle it. what is her problem? why can t she wait for the answer. argh, i am fcking pissed.

now we are just in a silent treatment position. i don t care anymore. i rather be alone.




one man down, fire at will.

WAHAHAHS. i am too lazy to post ;D
I came back from Kuantan on Tuesday.

blahs i went back to school on wednesday for Art lessons. Apparently i didn t do much. I LACK ALOT OF PEACOCK. OH YARH. Mr oei told me i won something for PRIZEWINNING xD I won something for ART. LOL. Come to think about it. I am pretty nervous about it.

I don t really want to shake Ms Chee hand ;l

After that i went bowling with Peipei and Yvonne.
Huaywen and Huay yi stayed over night. My night was really bad. We took my brother and mine mattress and joined them together.

It was not really a comfortable night for me.
Because:

Wen kicked me.
Wen took up my space
Wen stole my bolster and
Wen had 2 blankets on her ):

When i complained to her the next morning, she simple told me
" sorry, i am used to sleeping alone "

---

today went to safra yishun to swim with deb. I think i have forgotten how to swim. Deb, i think i swam so much slower than you today. This is supeer sarky. Later we hang around by the side of the pool. Then i played a game with Ryan. I threw my gorgle down for ryan to dive and get it. Later halfway, a guy came and dive in to get my gorgle. I was like o_O thanks. LOL. weird. But i appreciate it. Went to dino for night and then went to raffles city to get E's ham. I SAW A SUPER BIG LOLLIPOPPPP. damn cool. only 28 bucks.

muahahas.

i gotta go now.
i have to get up early tomorrow.

nights. ;D

WAHAHAs.

Had math test today and Chris introduced me to a new friend. His friend thought i was his girlfriend :l My face showed him the `i think you better try again' look and at that moment he almost fell backwards while rocking his chair on 2 legs.

TODAY WAS SUPER FUN WITH PEI PEI lorhs. We kept laughing at erotic stuff. It was super damn funny. I took about 4 pictures of erotic stuff. We almost peed in our pants. There was this one statue who had a SUPER LONG DICK! It was 2600 years old. Even cavemen were horny back then :l TSK. Another picture was a woman smiling away at the different sizes of penis toys :l TSK. NO, it was not a cave woman, it was a modern woman. Next was a man who had a special equipment to hang at the chest so he could breastfeed the babies. TSK. nevermind, at least he is helping his wife. Last was a woman who was super muscular. TSK, may women rule the world

Later went to Amy to cut my fringe. My mother was super irritated at the way it was dangling and covering my eyes. Brought pei pei to my house later as she was CURIOUS.

Huaywen and Huay yi came to my house for dinner.
OH YARH, bought her a maplecard. I wanted to buy her the fruit basket wallet but it was out of stock. Sheet, this is what you get from taking your time.

If only i could upload these pictures ):
such a pity.


anyway i was be in kuantan!
will only be back on tuesday night.
please pray that i will HAVE cute boys on the trip
because a chio-bu like me will be wasted then ):

wait, cute TEENAGERS.
and please i do not want anti social people.

(:

FUSSY PIG xD

blahs, what is wrong with my freaking stamina? I get tired easily. Can t run as fast as i used too ): Oh gosh, i hate this. i must go on diet, loose those FATSSS. It also helps for my soon to be 2.4 run. But for now, i am just snacking away, enjoying my life, telling myself yah i will diet, EVENTUALLY.

argh. today i was the only senior in floorball. Thanks arhs yvonne,pei and yunxian. All pangseh me. Sians.

Cannot stand Eunice. Although i hate all kaykao attitude, she can really make me laugh like crazy sometimes.

Sians! today got fire drill. WE were practically sitting in the hot sun. then we would start picking grass, throwing it everywhere. Then i realise he was staring at me? WELL HOPEFULLY xD
i did stare at him too.

I started teasing Shu Zhen later. Because she was a bit on the plump side, the grass beside her was not flatten like the grass UNDER her. Being curious, i told her that there was an ant crawling towards her butt. She moved and not only was the grass flatten, the grass was white.
Sians, no oxygen, just fart gas :l

I even took a picture of it xD

I wanted to tell Yvonne about it. Luckily i didn t. Jia yi was close to Shu Zhen. :l


hahas yah i know.
i never die before ):
i am sorry.
i was crazy today/

Paramount lost to Lichfield.

congrats yvonne.
sheet. My penalty shot sarks ):

hais.
all i know now is get ready for interschool on June 27
i believe we can!

all i can say is

" look how good they are, if only floorball was like this. :l "

YAYNESS! Our SGS boys won 64-56 to Woodgrove (: CHAMPIONNS. Woot. So happy for them. If only our floorball interschool would be like this, i would feel DAMN PROUD OF MYSELF xD. hahas btw, the C girls interschool compeition didn t get into the finals but i think they really improve from last year.

SGS (12 - 2 ) YUHUA - wahahas, they got thrashed-
SGS ( 2 -3 ) NORTHLANS - not bad larhs.
SGS ( 0-4 ) BUKIT MARAH - not really surprised :l
SGS( 4-0 ) SWISS COTTAGE - DAMN surprised xD

With these scores, can you imagine that they were in the last place last year?

Oh yah, If you ever need cheerleaders. Don t ever call our school. You will just get silence.
LOL. We can t even do a proper Kallang wave. :l Nevermind, i like the way we sang our school song, SERANGOON GARDEN FLAME BURN BRIGHHTTTTTTTTTT.

woohoo!

Tomorrow is my Interhouse Floorball Compeition
I seriously can t wait!

I HAVE SUNBURN ): BOOOOOO
THIS IS NOT GOOD, NO GOOD AT ALL
BOOOOOOOO.

today CIP sark):
today CIP SARKS.

Sonika and I teamed up together while the rest go somewhere else. We asked for donation around woodlands library there. It was so damn hot ): Now i have red cheekbones ): and red arms. When there were nobody at the pathway, sonika and I quickly stand under the shade and pant like a dog. We had alot of rejection of course, and i got a scolding from a old man. He told me i was a selfish girl who ask an old man like him who is not working, had no money. He practically took out his wallet to make sure i believe him! I apolegise, and later before he walked off. He said: But even if i am rich, i won t donate to you guys. o.o" Tell me what logic is that?
Sonika and I practically attacked everybody who walked at that pathway. We saw a man walking towards us,so i told sonika to 'attack' him. Sonika said he looked so stingy. But when sonika asked for donation. HE GAVE HER 5 BUCKS. THIS IS SO NOT FAIR! ): This tell you that sonika concludesion is not always correct xD.

Later everybody meet up to have a meal at LJS. Omg, i want to complain. I ordered a Combo 1, and this was my first time i ever seen such a meagre CHICKEN. It was 2 fingers wide when normally it is 3 fingers wide. I kept complaining to sonika, and in the end we exchanged xD.Later we started 'work' again. Again, we stood under the hot sun. In the end, we were so tired. We asked Selly to join us for an Icecream at Macdonalds. OMG. Selly;s tin was SUPER HEAVY OKAYS. It is so filled up with coins and she still wanted to ask for more donations~ LOL. So Sonika and I decided to stand outside Woodlands Library and really we got alot of donation! xD Then halfway a shopkeeper told Sonika and I to get lost as we were disrupting his customers, bothering his customers and he have at least shooed 30 of us away. Yah. I have 30 clones -.- Then as he went on and on, He was donating to sonika. o.o OMG. So sheet. Please don t stand at this line, just don t stand at this line. Grr, in the end i was quite pissed. I said, OKAYS OKAYS! FINE, I GO STAND THERE OKAY! I GO STAND THERE. - walk off- Then sonika said he went to complain to one old man. LOL. Please, i was not bothering his customers. Nobody wanted to look at his books because
1) His shop sell books, but behind him is a BIG LIBRARY
2) Who would want to buy books which are sold at 5 for $10.

would you?

Lastly i got scolded because i wasn t wearing pants. Woodlands was quite windy. So my skirt kept flying up. As the lady was donating, I suddenly move to adjust my skirt. Aiyoh, AH GIRL ARH. YOU DUNNO HOW TO WEAR PANTS ARH. HUH, YOU WANT PEOPLE TO SEE YOUR BUTT HUH. I am sorry Auntie, I have to wear full uniform, SADLY. But you can post your feedback in my school comments box which is the shredder machine.

TRY HARDER.


MUAHAHHAHAs. Later joined Kaka with her sister and her cousin to watch FATMAMA2. DAMN funny. You guys should go and watch. It is really a good show. THANKs kaka.

): i can t believe they celebrate huaywen birthday without me. This is the second time ): Aiyah nevermind. I got an ideal present for huaywen (:

blahs. Thats all
Overall

BAD DAY )):



then a fun night (:

I AM SOOOOO DEAD.
i just ate twisties in my brother room, and unknowingly dropped some on the floor. And, ants came and i killed them with a piece of paper and i am still convinced that they are coming back.
): I am sorry Kor, but i was hungry!

I am sorry Pauline. I know you don t like people killing ants. But .. ):

---

Today i stayed back just to give out shirts to the juniors who will be playing for the inter-school compeitition this tuesday. This is so sickening, Yun xian gets to leave early cause she is the VICE CAPTAIN. Si yun xian, you watch out kays! I also want early dismissal! ): THIS IS SOOOO rankingBIASED. YAY. that reminds me, i am going to watch our school basketball team play against WOODGROVE (: They are already qualified in the finals! So happy for them (:

All the sec 3 came back from their camp. All of them look so haggard but they looked like they had fun :l BLAHHSS.

While Peipei and Yvonne had thier A maths remedial, I sit there extra, doing my chinese homework xD. I CAN DO KAYS! So proud of myself. (: I do hope my chinese get a B3. XD But with my lousy close passage and my crappy compo, hardly ): Then Mr. oei left halfway for dunno-what-sheet, leaving us in the classroom alone. So in the end, i think the 4E2 girls cannot tahan, want to go home. So, Hui jie was quite guilty about it. Then she suggested writing a note to him. It goes like this.

MR OEI.

We are sorry that we left without you
Don t worry we got the anwers to the question already

Ps: WE MISS YOU *omg. pukessss*

4e2 girls
and one 4e3 girl (me!)

----
I can t imagine that we wrote that sickening letter. HELP ME SOMEONE!


----

PEIPEI AND YVONNE OWE ME 2.50 (:
I AM A CREDITORRR. okays, this accounts thing is getting to me :l
sians. tomorrow got Cip.
but i know it is going to be fun.
with my friends around (:
___

BLAHS~
today floorball training was nothing much. Yvonne, Peipei, Yunxian and I just played by ourselves but it was damn funny la. We always get ourselves into big burst of laughters and i realised we all have something in common. When we laugh, we always must sit on the floor. I dunno why. Maybe it is because we can t really balanced ourselves really well, or when Ivan is walking. LOLLL okays. EVIL ):

Today, was not about Ivan, it was about Wee kiat. HE IS DAMN FUNNY LORHS. We kept teasing him. He is a nice person la, but i dunno why we are bullying him. For example:
1. we keep teasing him about his relationship with Jessica
2. when we loose the ball, peipei and i will whine like a baby and wait for him to get it. xD
DAMN FUNNY LORH.
Laugh until my stomach hurts
Then Wee kiat high stick, then whack Yvonne in the stomach! LOL she was like asking yun xian what happened and it went like this. "HAHAHAHS, what happENNNNN (in caps means she got hit) Again, we rolled on the floor and started laughing away. Then yun xian laughed so hard, she accidentally hold her stick up and whack wee kiat in the jaw.

Then this yun xian was like asking Wee kiat to treat us drinks. Then wee kiat said he had no money today. So normally that is how the conversation ends but Wee kiat added " How about nxt wednesday or your next trainin?" Everybody was like shocked. So i asked what about lunch? Then he also said OKAY. -.- POOR GUY . I like the way pei pei say, WHY YOU SO NERD. xD

Then that guy was wearing an Angsali T shirt. So behind his T shirt, there was a BIG letter A. So i questioned Peipei what it means, i can t really remember her answer then i questioned Yun Xian, She said AH KUA (gay) i really cannot stop laughing ):

YAYYY, my accounts test got 34/35. You can clap now (:

GOSH, i am really tired today. ): i didn t really have any energy to play floorball, i was super sians :l. then i just know Wee kiat. He really one qian bian guy. He keep telling me the people who can t shoot, then i sort of shut him off, " you can shoot arhs? " okays. THAT WAS MEAN. <;]

TODAY, Sec 3 had their camp. SO FUN ): i miss those camping days i had with Richielyn. I really miss her ALOT. I wonder how is she doing now. I really hope to meet her one day. ): and i never really had the guts to talk to Rachel about Rich's whereabout. I didn t have the guts, ever since that day. That effing day.


ANYWAY, what i really wanted to say is
I WANT TO GO SEC 3 CAMPPPP TOOOOO ):
HOW DARE YOU GUYS JUST LEAVE ME HERE, STUDYING
WHILE YOU GUYS HAVE FUN HUH!
... ): -cries-
some good friends you guys are.

-yawn-
i am really tired ):

`he drowns in his dreams
`an exquisite extreme i know
` he's as damned as he seems
`more heaven than a heart could hold
`and if i tried to save him
`my whole world would cave in
` just ain t right,
`baby, just ain t right..

`oh and i don t know
`i don t know what he's after
`but he's so beautiful
`such a beautiful disaster
`if i could hold on
`through the tears and the laughters
`would it be beautiful
`or just a beautiful disaster

Beautiful Disaster by Kelly Clarkson
She rawks my world (: natural and so not zi lian . WAHAHAS

School was nothing much but a bore. I had my composition test today. I wrote about my father molesting me. I know ): How er xin can i get right. I had no ideas. i only had 40 minutes to write. Then i just chiong lor. I hope i don t write out of point. -.- The marks would be `pretty' if i fail.

Today my contact lens dropped out twice. I had to rush to the toilet to put it back in. At one point of time, it was quite shrivelled up. BUT IT WAS A NEW PAIR, it was supposed to last me for 2 weeks. I just heck and placed it in. PAINNNNN, but later it was okay. (:

yesh. TOMORROW THERE FLOORBALL TRAINING.(:
I want a fatpipe stick. A new floorball stick. But i keep having this weird feeling that if i get a new stick, my current stick would get jealous. -.- YAH, i know. Stupid Childish thinking of mine. :l

i need to sleep now.
It is 11:34pm.

http://img158.imageshack.us/img158/624/yuncomic0bi.gif

GO SEE. i drew it.
YS HELP ME TO PUT ON WEBBY xD

the comic is super lame. -.-



* read from left to right. (:

argh. boring sunday.

slack the whole day in front of the computer.

such a bore.

HE started his nonsense again.
fuckit. who needs him.

Me: i think he needs to go to anger management

Mom: Nah. This time he need to go WOODBRIDGE

me: - o,o -
-walk off-

when i locked myself in the cubicle to cry, i seriously thought of flushing my head down the damn toilet bowl. i wanted it to flush down all the ugly memories i had of HIM. i was so pissed at my two-faced father. i never want to look at him in the eyes again. Why must he always caused me to feel anger and hatred towards him. what does he get out of this? tell me. i want to know.
yes, you got promoted. you want to host a party, you want people to enjoy it. but why must your wife and you daughter had to deal with your fking bullshit just because the guests were earlier than the host. i am glad deb came and hug me, letting me know that she was always there. i think while i was rubbing my eyes, my contact lens came out. So meanwhile i had to deal with one len.

when i came back and join them for dinner, i saw him laughing away, smiling like nothing happen just now. But what can i do? I just clutched my fists till it turned white, so white that i felt my hand was shaking. i tried not to think about it, i wanted to be happy, i wanted the world to know i don t give a damn about him anymore. I did. I laughed with deb, ate happily while cursing him throughout. i am full, but still always hungry for revenge.

i am sorry. i don t want to go to australia to study. i don t want to leave my mother alone with that beast. no, i am not a mummy's girl. i am just afraid something might happen when i am not there, not there for her. She 's so strong, she bear with his bullshit for so long but why haven t she shed a single tear? not like me, a useless weakling that can get tramped on so easily. sometimes i wish he could just die, leaving just my mother, kor and i. but how could i say such a thing? i do not know. i just know that i want to end this miserable life with HIM.

Dear Kor, i cried at the airport because i was afraid i could not handle him without you being here for me. I thought after you left, i will be all alone, handling him. I am so scared, ever so scared. I tried to be strong. But sorry, i just burst today, i was too sick of his nonsense.

-yawns-

WHOOHOO! today was the first time i actually earned something from the PICK IT UP MACHINE in compass point arcade (: I picked up a BIG BUGS BUNNY. YAYNESS it was my first try, even better xD. Everybody was staring at me, wen and yi looked so stunt at first. My first reaction was OMG. I CAN T BELIEVE THIS FCKING SHEET xD

okays that was vulguar :l

i wanted to give it to my cousin. but thier mum won t approve of it. OH WELL. Nevermind i found a new bunny that does not POOP, does not require food and it only need LOVE ;D
AWWW (:

----

Didn t go school today. My back was toally aching from yesterday match. I had a swollen feet too. My mother woudln t allow it at first. So i just told her to off my light and open the door slightly so my father would think i left for school liao xD IT actually works or maybe he knows just that he coudln t be bothered to say which is totally not possible :l

Cannot believe Dom found my bloggie ):

OKAYS. IT IS MORE THAN 100% THAT EVERYBODY HATES PARAMOUNT NOW.

Ever since last year, everyone started hating Paramount, thanks to Mr. Oei. It was because we won all the floorball matches; B girls B boys C girls C boys. So it was natural for him to show off and also more natural for people to get disgusted at him.

Kelly's team only needed to win Burghley to get into the semi-final. Somehow the first half of the match was sooo crucial. So pressurizing. I kept asking Kelly to defend. She could have score so many goals. TOO LAZY ): Anyways, Lejoy scored a goal again Burghley. It was supposedly to be 2-0. But somehow lejoy's goal was not counted. Robin said it did not even touch the net. I think most will agree that it went in but because everyone hate paramount. Eustance who is in charge purposely pause the time so maybe burghley can score during that limited time. So Mr oei was quite angry that it was not counted and started shouting at Robin. I freaked out, I kept asking Mr oei to calm down. I mean we won already, forget about it. He woudln t let it GO! so in the end Mark came and so called shut him off. " If you can prove that the ball went in , please try and show us like use a video camera." Sheet la. Now everyone hate Paramount even more. and then i realise if the referee is not so sure that if that is a goal, it will not be counted. Omg. what SHEET? referee should be sure of himself.

Hmm, everybody found me SUPER FIERCE when i was playing :l Mr. Wong, Babita, Cherlyn and lots more. I AM REALLY THAT FIERCE? i know i push alot of times =x but fierce as in? Mr. Wong say i should be more wen rou -.- (gentle) Go away la. But i must admit i play good xD
okays thick skin =x. I think i should exercise more ): My stamina is decreasing recently. BUT ANYWAYS PARAMOUNT IS IN SEMI FINALS (:

hahas i still can remember one part where i pass to Yun Xian for her to shoot in. Unfortunately my ball was too fast for her. So gloria was like YES! I turn around and gave her an ugly stare for a long time before i run off. Now i am angry at Yun Xian because i let LichField's second team win. Please. :l





I make an ghostly encounter in school today. I ran to the toilet because my contact lens dropped off. As i was putting it back in, i noticed one of the 3 cubicles was occupied. Suddenly a girl came out of the cubicle looking pale. " Did you hear anybody singing just now" she asked but i simply shake my head and told her i just came in. She said that before i came in, someone else came in and started singing. And the singing stop when i came in, she thought the person went out when i came in. However i didn t see anyone when i rushed in. She grabbed on to me as we headed out of the toilet. As we walked further down the corridor, i didn t know what made me turn around. But when i did, I saw a figure rushing into the toilet. It had a white blouse and a blue skirt but i coudln t see the face. And even weirder, if the person was rushing to the toilet, why didn t i hear the toilet door slam? I wanted to check it out but the girl was too freaked out so i leave it. Beside i never seen the girl before. hmm? HELP ME? :l

got to go for dinner (:
WAY TO GO JINGYUN ;D
I LOVE MYSELF.

i was super pissed at somebody today. Tomorrow is Floorball InterHouse B girls but somehow i don t want to play. I can t stand it when people goes like WAH PARAMOUNT SURELY LOSE LA, PARAMOUNT LOUSY ONLY. what the hell, what is thier problem? If your irritating at Mr Bryan Oei, Go tell him, Go scream at him, Go get fking angry with him, Just dont come to me saying negative stuff about Paramount. It is getting to me.

Is it wrong to cheer for your own team? So what if i sat on 'your chair'. Do you think i care? Do you think i am scared of you and lower my standard just because you think your bigger? Just shut up and get lost. I don t need to listen to you, i don t need you to ruin my happiness.

I never once keep repeating that i hate Lichfield, Angsali or Kensington. Please just leave me alone.I am sick of this. Ignoring you is the best i can do. Although i wish i could hit you..

Don t count on me to win.
Have faith in yourself too.

First thing first, I hate yesterday blog. It was full of lies.

Yesterday Yvonne actually came to my house to bake brownies for the 3 girls - Lejoy, Peipei and Sonika. We only bought one packet of brownie and a packet of decoration. So we happily bake away in my house, only to realise that the brownie was actually this thick :
______________________
l l
l______________________l


It was soooo thin for 3 people! So in the end we had to go all the way to shop and save to buy 2 more packets and powdery sugar. However i could not find powdery sugar and i thought fine grain was ok. So i tried asking the cashier but she could not understand a single english word i was saying cause she was from China -.- I ask her if she could return me back the sugar packet while i call my mum to check if it is correct. BUT SHE JUST WOUDLN T HAND IT OVER TO ME. In the end my mother said it was not powdery enough :l Yvonne went to bake one layer for a brother too. (: I didn t help her, i wanted to make sure she did it with alllll her sisterly love xD.

OKAYS, why i say monday's blog was a lie? Because I do not have a friend called Sandra and the presents were meant for the three girls and peipei actually found out and yvonne wanted me to lie. So i felt pretty uncomfortable writing about yesterday's blog. :l I AM GLAD IT IS ALL OUTTTT NOW (:


-----

Today was a last minute party. But in the end it turn out to be a SUCCESS! Yvonne and I could do it without HIMMMM. BAHAHAHAs. So he is not so biggggg after all (:

-HI 5-

We managed to PULL peipei and ask lejoy to join us and wait for sonika to finish her rehersal while Yvonne run home to get the soft toys. I told PeiPei and Sonika that we are celebrating Lejoy's Birthday and i told Lejoy that we were celebrating Pei pei birthday (: SO DUMB RIGHT. ALL BELIEVE ME (: wahahas. Celebrate downstairs my block. We were screaming birthday song then i make sure each of them cut the BROWNIE. Everybody say it is nice (: Hello, OF COURSE. YVONNE and JINGYUN hard efforts. How can it not be nice! okays. Nevermind, you guys must be coughing now. :l

Anyways HAPPY BIRTHDAY PEIPEI (: HOPE YOU GET TO YOUR DREAM POLY ;D

English Common test sarks ):
ME NO GOOD IN VOCAB.

Just saw this guy's bloggie. Not bad i must say ;D I wonder who is that girl he is refering to. He seem sooo sad about it. Oh well (: I do not know him well. What can i do to comfort him? HELP MEEEE

[[Today i gave bday present to Sarah. I wondered why peipei think it is for her? SO SUPER THICK. Peipei, I will get yours during March Holidays. You wait okays (: ]]

Yvonne told me about him. She said he had a girlfriend because she actually ask him how is you and jingyun -.- I wonder what did i do to her in my past life. She is always getting at me? Anyway, all the best to you. True loveeee.

HAPPY BIRTHDAY CHERLYN. all the best for the days ahead.

I cannot post much today.
EVEN THOUGH I WANT TO.
but something is stopping me ):

My dad keep trying to open a conversation with me. Sigh, I just answer him with one word like Yes, No. I am too sick with this relation between me and him. argh!

i never like sunday. it is the one day where you know there is something on tomorrow and of course, looking ahead to another weekend :l OHWELL. Not to forget there is a english common test tomorrow. I DON T LIKE THIS AT ALLLLLL. And Yvonne is coming over (:

My mother was quite sad today. She had recently went to the hospital to see an old friend of hers who had ovarian cancer. She look so tensed up and like maybe she felt it will be her turn next. Of course i comforted her and said life still have to go on. Only my mother didn t say anything. OH MUM. You know Kor and I will always love you. Don t feel this way.

There was this guy on television who had very small eyes. I just exclaim to my mum, wondering how he could see and stuff. As usual my father had negative comments " WHATEVER IT IS, THE GUY HAVE BETTER EYESIGHT THAN YOU" whatever, like yours is THAT GOOD. hmph.

anyway kor is on
byeee

Seriously no one actually know how i feel about my father. They think they do. But how can they feel what i am feeling when my father is acting outside to the world and a fcker at home? We just got back for Gi ku birthday party. Everyone had fun except him. We had pasta, pizza and so much more delicious stuff but all he could actually say was :

"The food is no big deal! The italian actually came to China and maybe mix several ingredients and call it pasta. I rather eat WAN TAN MEE man."

Please, Nobody wanted to invite him actually. I think just for my mom's sake. And when my brother called, it was 1 am over there in Aust. He sound extremly tired but all my father could say:

" What the hell is the boy still doing awake. His 2 friends already sleeping and he is still up. He better adapt to his surroundings. No more sleeping late and waking up late anymore. when people is studying, he is sleeping"

Kor make the point to call and talk to you. what is your fcking problem? Is it when you talk to your family members, there must be negative comments? Why can t you be happy that kor is safe and sound. Why do you worry about this? He is another kiss-up, boot- licker person.

I really hate this.
I am sorry i ever mention leaving home.
but why cant anybody actually understand.

He does not even know my age and even know how to pronouce my name. He just call his children by BOY or GIRL. Make it a point to at least remember who we are. He thinks he have power, i just wait until he grow old. All he cares is his face, he is so worry that he will loose it.

meanwhile i will just have to survive here.
on my own now..

Look, i am not depressed
i am just fcking pissed.

---

went out with yvonne to Bishan to get birthday presents for the 3 girls. We wanted to get them a name keychain. So there used to be a big blocks of letters but now it is also sold smaller in size. As people rarely buy the big blocks, It was sold cheaper and yvonne asked if it was a good idea. " I think people seldom buy this anymore, like most will find it ugly and childish" -smack mouth- The girl who was buying the big blocks of letter was actually glaring at me. Yvonne totally ran out of the shop and LEFT ME THERE.

I don t want to say too much about the prezzies. I am afraid that they will read it .(:

anyways,i really had fun with you guys today.
both my friends and cousins,
thanks for being there for me .
i really appreciate it
and of course my mother
for always standing by my dreams. (:

If i won the grammy awards, i would say that phrase!
WAHAHAHAHAS

okays i think the wine is getting to me.

-rub eyes-

I can roughly summarise my father's personality; characteristic in one way : ARSEHOLE. Again he is trying to find things to get back at me. YOU KNOW WHAT, he may have hit my irritated button but fuck it. Even my mum told me not to fuck care him. yesh, my mum say fuck.

We were on our way to dinner. I get in the car and i supposingly slam the door and when it was time to get out, i supposingly slam it again. And..

Father aka arsehole: why the girl is always slamming the door?

Mother: Huh what door are you talking about?

Father: THE CAR DOOR! I tell you arh girl, if you cannot close the car door properly, i make sure you do it 500-1000 times.

Me: *keep quiet*

*silence*

Father: If i hear you slam the car door again, i make sure you don t go to Kuantan

me: *think to myself* yay!

*silence*

Father: You choose , you want to go kuantan or not!

me: *think to myself* Obvious yes! but not with you.

*silence*

me: *think to myself* i will take my revenge when he grow old.

---- end----

sigh, always trying to find things to get at me. idoit. And he is always repeating himself. Senile :l


OMGGGG
today we finally did the filming thing!
there were so many bloopers. Eunice's voice keep like going off at some times. In the end i took over her job. I bet when the video is shown, there will be serious burst of laughters for our class :l

blahs.

wahahas i just heard kor kor on skype (:

-cries- KOR, i miss you ):
even though we are always fighting, quarrelling, cursing at each other, we somehow what know that we still love each other. From today onwards, all these will have to put on hold for a moment and until you come back, it will be back to 'play'. I could see that yesterday was so awkward for you when it was time for you to check in but i woudln t let go. I am sorry i embaroussed you with my crying. :l But I still cannot take the fact that you will be going away for soo long. Of course there will be emails, skype, calls and sms. It is the actual Human Body of you i am missing. YOU MUST CALL MORE OFTEN KAYS! and of course together we must both mug hard for this important year. I hope when i am done with my O level, i can go to Sydney and meet up with you.

I love you always (:



hearts.
yunnn ((:

HAPPY VALENTINE DAY ((:

at first i thought to myself

no boyfriend= no valentine gifts
no admirers= no valentine gifts.

okays that is sad.
see, nobody likes me.
But i guess today, VALENTINE day prove me wrong. I mean what the hell do i need to depend on these people to make me happy. How could i forget my precious gems which are my family and friends. Do i need to depend on a guy who is supposingly the one who TRUELY LOVE me? Guess what, The obvious answer is NO. I realised that I really took things for granted, never appreciating my love one until something happen. So, thanks to valentine day, I must perk up and love my life, because i only enjoy it once.


My first rose is from Lejoy. I was surprised. What could i say. So what if my first rose was from a girl? I was smiling to myself deep down inside my heart, as i walked home with the almost withering rose in my right hand. It smells nice and sweet. The one smell, i will never forget - Lejoy's gift to me. Thank you so much Lejoy. I love you (: I am so glad i am part of her life.

My second valentine gift was from Gloria. 4 kisses wrapped in scrap-paper. I wanted to spare them till i reached home. But Kisses wouldn t wait for me, so i enjoyed myself - me and kisses during math remedial (:
Chocolate do make people happy. So sinful yet delicious.

My third valentine gift was from Cherlyn. A small heart-shaped sweet with the taste of strawberry flavor. She didn t make me cookies like she did for the rest. But like most will always say, the thoughts count, well said. Besides it tasted nice and chewy (: yum.

The rest of the valentine gifts will be Deborah and Yilin. Someone who is so close to me but yet so far away. Virtual Valentine cards were send and a global sms from yilin.

I appreciate all this.
Even a small sentence like HAPPY VALENTINE DAY
can actually mean so much.

We had early dismissal today (: Because it was meant to be a celebration for good 'O' level results for last year. WAHAHAS, English Common Test also had to be postponed to next week. Actually ALL the TESTS for today have to be canceled. OH WHAT JOY

Fed-up at my brother yesterday, I COUDLN T BELIEVE HE ACTUALLY TOOK NEOPRINTS with Kaka lor. All this time i been bugging him to take with him. He always try to run away, ignore my conversation, or SCOLD ME. He say it is a waste of money, blah blah blah. Please, for both the Card Neoprint, He look like he was having FUN. Hug here, Hug there. :lll
GRRRRRRRRRRRR.

I am now making a valentine gift for him. I AM NOT LOSING TO KAKA. hmph. but hers was nice lor ): unfortunately i don t have the money to SPEND ON HIM. So, basically, professionally, I will use my CREATIVE BRAIN to come up with something :l

TODAY HAD LJS FOR LUNCH ((: i haven t eat that for a LONGGG time. Later we dragged ourselves around Bishan cause gloria need to buy VALENTINE stuff :l She actually bought for Yvonne, Pei Pei and I. woot. Too bad, i didn t get anything for her xD Later went to Kovan to play bowling (: ROCKS MAN :l Played 2 games which cost us = 13.50 =ooo IS THAT MEANT TO BE CHEAP OR EXPENSIVE. 30cents more for extra frame, but wht the heck is that? :l Gloria coudln t come, apparently her parents had quarrelled and she didn t dare to ask.

That about it.

Gosh, on wednesday i have to come back early from floorball ): BECAUSE KOR is leaving already. SO FAST :l

I hope this friday's filming is confirm.
It has been dragging for TOOOO long.
ever since LAST month.

yesterday was alfian's birthday (:
celebrate it at tampines's Pizza Hut.
this is the first time i heard alfian went steady after meeting her 3 days ago =o. I hope this time it will work out for him. Juilet seem so anti social and stuff. She didn t like the way we tease alfian, She kept pouting :l And later she seem so happy when it was time to go home. We bought ice cream cake for alfian (: Oreo flavor ((: Then Zhi Qiang go and act gay, planted a cherry in his mouth and made alfian take it out - with his mouth too. xD Funny, alfian coudln t even look at Zhi Qiang in the eye. They are sooo gay (:

I later found out Juilet was Haffiz's Ex. omg =o. I actually found her throught Haffiz friendster account. She sound a little despo :l.

WAH, ZhiQiang getting more qian bian. We kept suaning each other. :l

Watched football until 2am. I still cannot believe middle- won chelsea (3-0) =oo
And ZhiQiang is sooo happy.
*ah bish*

Before he went home, took piccys for them. i actually FORCED them to take candid photos. Zhiqiang said" i am sorry, i dunno how to act cute." WAH, what was that suppose to mean .
In the end there were photos of funny faces, stern faces, ): aiyah, at least better than nothing.

hmm, gotta help with my brother's packing.

):
HE IS LEAVING SOON ):

Can t you see i am ignoring you.
I just want to be friends.
But can i say,
can we really stay that way?

No one really know me,
And not even one can
see my hidden tears,
after all this miserable years.

You asked me to believe you.
But After all that had happen, the
tension between us,
just became tighter,
losing our faith in
each other....

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leave me alone.

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*clutch fists*

Why am i always acting happy?
BUT I AM NOT.

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